Setting intentionality
A practical guide to setting intentionality and why it matters for relationship-driven professionals.
The difference between a contact and a connection is not semantic. It is the difference between a name in your phone and a person who thinks of you when an opportunity crosses their desk.
Setting Intentionality
What separates professionals who get consistent referrals from those who do not is rarely talent or charisma. It is follow-through. The willingness to maintain a relationship even when there is no immediate payoff. The discipline to check in with someone when you do not need anything from them.
This sounds simple because it is. But simple does not mean easy. Without a system to prompt these interactions, the urgent always displaces the important. You respond to the client emailing you today instead of reaching out to the connection from last month whose value has not materialized yet.
Making It Work
Start with your existing network. You do not need more contacts — you need better engagement with the ones you already have. Identify your top fifty relationships. These are the people who have referred you business, opened doors, or simply shown up consistently in your professional life.
Now ask yourself: when was the last time you reached out to each of them without needing something? If the answer is more than three months for any of them, you have work to do.
- Set a cadence. Not every relationship needs the same frequency. Your top tier might warrant monthly check-ins. Your broader network might need quarterly touchpoints. The specific intervals matter less than the consistency.
- Use a system. A spreadsheet works. A dedicated relationship CRM works better. The tool matters less than the habit of tracking who needs attention and when.
- Keep it human. A quick text asking how someone is doing will always outperform a templated email. Personalization is not a marketing tactic — it is basic respect.
Building a strong professional network is not a project with a finish line. It is an ongoing practice — like fitness or meditation — that compounds over time. The professionals who get this right are not the most connected. They are the most consistent.
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Tools like Relatable exist to make that consistency easier — surfacing who needs attention, tracking engagement patterns, and ensuring no important relationship goes cold. But even without a tool, the principle holds: show up for the people who matter, and they will show up for you.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I network as an introvert?
Introversion is not a networking disadvantage — it is a different approach. Introverts often excel at one-on-one conversations and deep listening, which are the foundation of strong relationships. Focus on smaller gatherings, follow up after events when you have energy, and lean into written communication when that feels more comfortable.
What is the best way to stay in touch without being annoying?
Lead with value, not asks. Share an article relevant to their interests. Congratulate them on a milestone. Ask a genuine question about something they mentioned last time you spoke. If every interaction is about what you need, people will stop responding. If every interaction shows you are paying attention to their world, they will look forward to hearing from you.
How do I rebuild a professional relationship that has gone cold?
Start with honesty. A simple message like 'It has been too long and that is on me — how are things going?' is more effective than pretending no time has passed. Most people appreciate the candor and are happy to reconnect. The awkwardness is almost always in your head, not theirs.
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